Advice To My Thirty Year Old Self

The age where I thought all the magic happened—thirty. 

And the last post in this series! The age where I thought all the magic happened—thirty. I feel most passionate about this post in the series, perhaps because it is the most recent in my journey. What advice would I give to my thirty-year-old self? Continue reading if you would like to know more.

Embracing Authenticity

Authenticity is essential for growth.

Regarding advice I would give my thirty-year-old self, I would tag this as one of my most important realisations. Being authentic is the most significant step I have made toward growth. I never understood why I craved authenticity, but I started making considerable progress once I became my true self!

The Power of Honesty

Being honest and transparent allowed me to receive feedback based on who I was, not on who I was attempting to be. Whether it was criticism or praise, I received genuine feedback, which helped me grow stronger and faster. 

Overcoming the Fear of Rejection

I used to be terrified of rejection. However, after being true to myself, the support I received far outweighed the criticism. While I did lose some connections, the quality of the connections I maintained after showing up as the imperfectly amazing woman I am is worth its weight in gold. Of course, I still get a few shocked reactions to being so open and honest after being known to be extremely reserved and quiet, but people are getting used to me being this way. I’m no longer afraid to admit my flaws and be truthful about my struggles. 

Navigating Life’s Challenges: Finding Joy in the Struggle

Embrace your Growing pains—you will become a much better person.

I mentioned my avoidant nature in a previous post. One thing I truly wish I could advise my thirty-year-old self to do is to embrace my trials. 

The Transformative Power of Trials

James 1:2-4 says, “Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy, for you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.”

When my husband first quoted this as his favourite text, I baulked! I could not wrap my mind around considering any trouble as joy. I had never been an optimist and did not intend to start that day! But I prayed consistently about it because I trusted the words of scripture. The journey toward embracing my struggles is not always fun, but I can say that I have made significant progress when it comes to maintaining a positive attitude about it. God gently responds to that prayer in ways that prevent me from becoming too overwhelmed.

Learning from Adversity

Embrace the hurts. Don’t avoid any of them. Bawl your eyes out if you must, but don’t run away. Deal with the issues sooner rather than later—the shame, criticism, and loss. Pray that God opens your heart to receive the lesson and help you grow more resilient.

The Power of Vulnerability

Pay attention to every feeling and every realisation. Your story may be what others need to hear someday. It could propel them on their journey toward healing and clarity. Do not underestimate your impact. Every struggle has the potential to become a powerful testimony. 

Creating Your Path: The Importance of Individuality

Determine what works for you, and forget what everyone else is doing.

I spent years watching other people’s techniques and progress. Sometimes, I tried imitating them, but it never worked for me. I always wondered why I could not enjoy the same results by taking the same steps others did. I did not realise I am a unique individual with a different life and goals. While some tips and tricks will work, I must determine my schedule, preferences, and limitations. 

Here is a perfect example. Before starting this journey, I reviewed some information online that showed me how to start a blog. All the ideas provided were brilliant but did not fit my purpose. Trying to follow all the advice felt overwhelming.

I felt like I had to do a million things to get it right. I grew frustrated and nearly quit the whole thing altogether. 

The Power of Self-Compassion

It took a few months away from everything to help clear my mind. I scrapped everything I had done and carefully chose pieces that matched my lifestyle, preferences and mission. I now take it slowly and intend to figure out the rest as time passes. That is still part of my process as I write this post. I am doing it at my pace and ensuring that I enjoy the journey that I am on. 

Ageing Gracefully: Reframing the Aging Process

Don’t fret that you’re getting old.

I was a thirty-year-old woman with no concrete plans for my future. To some well-meaning persons, that was a cause for concern. “You’re not getting any younger!” I heard this quite often, which soon made me doubt my decisions. It took me a while to stop the cycle of doubt that popped up each time I felt lectured. 

Embracing the Journey

While most people mean well, the life you choose is your responsibility. You are not getting any younger, but you do not have to subscribe to anyone else’s timeline or to-do list. You don’t have to do anything like anyone else. Instead of fretting, see your life as your unique opportunity to experience life in the way that best suits you and your circumstances.

Finding Purpose in Every Stage

See this as a chance to practice everything you have learned from the hard knocks you have received. Endeavour to share your stories with others who go through similar experiences. Turn your stories of regret into worthwhile lessons and your happy times into magical moments for those who need to hear them. Seeing their eyes light up with hope as they realise that there is hope for them will be worth it. Share with them how you are still growing and learning daily and looking forward to your next adventure. Remember, life is not a destination—it is a journey. 

A Future Full of Possibilities

You have better things coming your way!

We tend to think that our best days or years are behind us. Whether this is true or untrue depends on your perspective. A positive growth mindset gives each day the potential to be a learning, growing, and exciting experience. With God as your guide, there is nothing to fear. By keeping close communication with your maker, listening to his voice, and obeying Him, you are well on your way to becoming the best version of yourself.

Final thoughts

I can’t wait to see what else I discover as I experience life. What about you? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

If you liked this post, check out my previous post in which I share the advice I would give specifically to the twenty-five-year-old me. Follow me on Twitter or Instagram to get updates.